Dorothea Crane

Mom:
What a wonderful person. The best mother anyone could ever hope
for.
Her devotion and love to me was unwavering. The most important
gift she gave to me, other than her unconditional love, was to
instill basic values in me to prepare me for life's events and to
help guide me to a life that had satisfaction and happiness. These
values included honesty, responsibility, loyalty, kindness and
compassion. These were the values she lived by and although I may
not have always followed them, they always remained with me giving
me a foundation for recovery and for correcting mistakes.
Mom lived through the great depression and was very frugal,
never talking the simple things in life for granted. Even though
she was frugal, she was generous to us kids and to the community
whenever the need was there. She participated in church activities,
volunteered for community services and made many beautiful quilts
for the University of New Mexico Children's hospital.
Our home life was filled with family activities, vacations every
year, wonderful birthday parties and holiday events. Mom was always
attentive to our needs; we were never neglected. She was a great
cook and we ate excellent home cooked meals, breakfast was always
ready when I got out of bed. Lunch was there when I came home from
school and we always ate together as a family at dinnertime. Mom
consoled me when I was sad and encouraged and supported me when a
challenge arose. She was always there to watch me at sporting
events, help me with my homework, always encouraged me to apply
myself in school and served as the den mother for our Boy Scout
troop.
Her discipline was fair and firm. I can't recall that she ever
really yelled at me and she never struck me. We given freedom to
make mistakes to learn on our own but Mom made sure that boundaries
were established. When I found some matches and was in the process
of setting the woodpile on fire in the garage with a gasoline can
nearby, Mom intervened. She gently explained to me that the outcome
of this endeavor may be that the garage would burn down. So that
night, she let me light the fire for the barbeque.
When I got my tongue stuck to our metal fence in 20 degree
weather, Mom came out to the house, smiled at me, poured warm over
me and the fence and then walked away smiling. She knew I wouldn't
do that again. One time, I began a mission of ringing all the
doorbells in the neighborhood and running away afterwards. One day,
when my Mom was having neighbors over for lunch, I overheard them
saying that someone was ringing their doorbells all the time but
there was no one there. Afterwards, Mom asked if I knew who was
doing this - I said "Don Strom" did it. She just looked at me, and
calmly said, you know, it would be nice if you could ring their
doorbell and just say Hello and how are you to them.
Dottie was married to her husband, Barney for 49 years. They
were a perfect complement to each other - mom had a quiet, somewhat
introverted demeanor whereas Dad was a true extrovert. They
traveled extensively and went to dinners or social events almost
every week. It was a happy marriage.
My parents retired to Albuquerque and Mom moved into a
retirement community after the death of her husband Barney. She
immediately made close friends, as she had done wherever she had
lived. In her 80's she was active and vibrant and participated in
many activities and social events. She had a stroke in 2007 and
made a dramatic recovery through her will, strength and
determination. The only residual affect of the stroke was
difficulty in word finding. Sometimes this resulted in humorous
situations that my mother would laugh at. Like when I asked her
what her favorite TV show was - she said she liked to watch the
"nudes". I'm not sure but I think she actually meant the news.
We had always offered mom the option of living near us in
Seattle. After her stroke, we were with the marketing staff at her
retirement home. She signed the papers to move into a room
providing assisted living. Immediately after signing, she announced
that she was moving to Seattle. So Mom signed a rental agreement
and advised she was giving notice to move all at the same time. So
were have been privileged to have Mom live near us over the past
two years. We became closer and Dottie grew to love my wife like
she was her daughter.
She quickly made new close friends and loved her stay at the
Brittany Park Retirement community. People always referred to her
as a "sweetie", she was liked by everyone and always greeted
everyone with a smile.. I saw her every week. Whenever I was coming
over, she always had the door slightly ajar. When I walked in I
knew I was in for a dose of affection and love. Every single time
she would rise from her chair, smile, open up her arms, give me a
hug and kiss and tell me she loved me. Every single time. We had so
much fun together, going on Ferry rides, scenic drives, going to
lunch and dinner, visiting the sights in Seattle or just relaxing
at our house. Dottie just loved our dog, Mattie. They became close
friends and Mom always carried his favorite treats in her
purse.
Mom never focused on herself - she was always inquiring about
how you were doing. She rarely complained and I don't think she
ever held resentment for long as she was a forgiving person. After
her stroke, she was unable to read books, which had always been one
of her favorite activities. But she didn't allow this to get her
down. She enjoyed putting puzzles together instead. Mom always
looked for the positive things in life. She took life on its own
terms and lived the serenity prayer: God grant me the serenity to
accept the things I cannot change, to change the things that I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.
She was just a sweetie in the finest sense of the word. I have
been blessed to have my mom's gracious presecence in my life. Her
spirit, compassion and love will always remain with me.
Thank you Mom. I love you.